Weekly Dose

Good morning!

Here are a few links, thoughts, and resources that have appeared in my "Weekly Dose" email newsletter this past month, which is free and goes out each Friday. Take a look around and let me know what you think.

Book I've been reading: How To Win Friends & Influence People by Dale Carnegie

This book has been recommended to me more times than I can count and has sat on my reading list for years. Now that I'm a few chapters in, I wish I'd picked it up sooner. It is a real treasure trove of helpful and insightful information on building relationships, and who among us couldn't benefit from improved relationships?

Quote I'm pondering: "Discipline is rarely enjoyable but always profitable." - Darin Patrick

I heard this quote on an episode of 5 Leadership Questions this past week and it has served as a great reminder of the value of discipline. Time and again the things that have helped me grow the most have come via taking the hard road. What seems unpleasant at the time often turns out to be the most beneficial. 

Habit I'm cultivating: Over the last couple of weeks I have been working to develop the habit of journaling daily. In the process I have found it to help me notice patterns in my life, process how I am feeling as well as clear my mind. The benefits have been tremendous and I look forward to seeing where it leads. 

Post I'm digging: 5 Signs Your Character is Slowly Imploding via Carey Nieuwhof
 
This article from Carey has been eating my lunch all week. I keep coming back to it and thinking over it day by day because I see myself in far too many of his warnings. If I am honest with myself, there are so many areas in my life that I'm failing and need to grow.

Podcast on repeat: 5 Leadership Questions - John Maxwell
 
I've listened to this podcast at least 10 times since it's release on October 6th and I still can't get enough. Grab your favorite drink, a pen & paper because your going to want to write down the wisdom flowing through your headphones on this one. Give it a listen and then listen again, and again. 

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Photography Quick Hits

My wife and I spend much of our time behind the lens capturing happy moments for couples and helping others who want to do the same. As we returned from a wedding reception late one night in the last few weeks, we discussed the thoughts and mental checklists we both use. It was a great conversation that helped me learn so much about how my wife's brain works and some helpful tips to improve the quality of my photos. 

Since most of us enjoy taking pictures to document the moments of our lives I want to share a few of the items on my mental checklist. From snapping the occasional selfie to grabbing your camera and hitting the road these quick thoughts can help you improve the quality of your photos almost immediately.

1. Are they backlit or in the shade?  

2. Am I cutting off their feet?

3. Am I leaving enough room on the sides?

4. Is there something sticking out of the back of the subject's head?

5. Is there anything odd in the background? 

Templates Are Your Friend

While we all have a ton going on and can barely keep it all straight in our heads, one trick continues to help me get it all done and keep everything straight. And it can transform your life as well! 

What is it?

Templates.

From emails to journal entries to conversations I template as much as possible. I've spent some time designing how I want to handle many of the regular tasks I face. This keeps me from making unnecessary decisions and reinventing the wheel each time. It also ensures that I don't miss or forget things.

How will you benefit from creating templates for just about everything in your life?

The obvious answer is that you will save time.

However saving time is useless if you don't utilize that time in a productive manner. Templates allow you to be intentional with the most valuable aspects of each task. Instead of worrying about all aspects of the email, or conversation you can focus only on the most important. 

Do you have an email that you write all the time? Create a template for answering it.

Do you keep a daily journal? Consider creating a template of daily questions or prompts.

Are there important regular conversations you need to have? Create templates for what you want to say and resources you want to point to.

Whatever it is you do on a regular basis there is most likely a way to create a template to help you do it not just efficiently but more intentionally.

Be Intentional

It feels as if someone is grabing me by the head, shaking it side to side and trying desperatly to get my attention. I must be slow to catch on because the idea of being intentional is everywhere, and I mean everywhere, for me lately. And I can understand why. 

Being intentional is key. If you want good relationships or anything else in life you have to be intentional. 

People tend to live rather unintentional lives. They just go with the flow and take what comes their way. 

This is never more true than in the area of habits. Recent studies have shown that upwards of 40% of the actions people perform each day are habits rather than actual decisions. That means that nearly half of what you do today will be a result of habits you've formed. Many of these habits have been passively allowed rather than intentionally cultivated. If there is a habit you want in your life, you have to be intentional about cultivating it in your life.  

Intentionality sets you up to lead your life, not just accept your life. Being intentional puts you in an active rather than a passive mindset as you face your day. You will be looking for how you can help, love, serve and add value to the lives of others. 

Growth doesn't just happen, you have to be intentional. You can't just throw a goal out there and expect to accomplish it, you have to be intentional about how you pursue it. Not all roads lead to the same destination. Intentional action is required.     

Weekly Experiment: Intentional Living 7 Day Experiment with John Maxwell

John Maxwell released his most recent book entitled Intentional Living this month and I immediately placed it on my reading list. In conjunction, John also released a great 7 day experiment to help you get in the habit of living intentionally. I just completed my 7 day experiment and it was truly life changing. I loved the active mindset this series got me in so much that I added a new question to my daily journal questions to ensure that I keep working to live intentionally long after my experiment has ended. Click the link above and sign up for the 7 day experiment. You'll be glad you did!

Ask good questions

As I have previously shared, some topics come up over and over again. Sometimes you just can't seem to shake certain topics. They just chase you down and pop up everywhere you go.

My most recent hound has been the importance of asking great questions.

It seems that no matter where I go, what I read or what I listen to it keeps cropping up in new and fresh ways. However it appears, the truth remains. 

Asking good questions is perhaps the most important habit / skill you can develop.

Why is asking good questions important? Asking good questions is important for at least three reasons:

1. Cultivating a learning mentality. A learning mentality is humbling because you have to admit that you don't know it all. However, it can be the first step towards unlocking new doors in your life. Everyone has something they can teach you, and asking good questions is how you figure out what it is. Ask questions that not only help you learn more about a particular person, but that also help you grow. Are you facing a major issue in your life? Is there a particular situation you're just not sure how to handle? Ask good questions of those around you.

2. Improves your relationships. Developing the habit of asking people really good questions shows people that they matter to you. One of the best ways you can show someone their value to you, is to ask their opinion. Dig deep in to who they are, what makes them tick, and what's going on deep inside their heart. It's quite difficult to dislike someone you've spent the time truly getting to know. Inevitably you will find common ground and something to appreciate about them. When you being to hold others in esteem and take a true interest in them, they will return the favor and take a deeper interest in you. As you esteem others, your value in their life will increase as well. There is no better example of this than marriage. Want to know one of the best secrets to having a great marriage? Ask your spouse intentional questions that help you learn more about them, and that communicate to them that you value your relationship. There isn't a relationship in your life that couldn't benefit from this type of intentional questioning.

3. Separates you from the crowd. You don't stand out from the crowd by being the guy with all the answers. Everyone knows that guy is a fake, and quite honestly no one wants to be around them. No, you stand out by the quality of the questions you ask. Ask really good questions at work, and then actually listen to the responses people give. Do that and you'll stand out just fine.

As I am growing in this area I also want to help you develop the habit of asking good questions. Below are 30 questions that can help you get started. Pick one or two questions and ask them over dinner tonight with your family, friends or roommates.  

  1. What's the best advice you've received, who gave it to you & how did it help you.
  2. What's the best advice you've ever given someone else?
  3. If you could do one thing for everyone in the world what would it be?
  4. What single event in your life had the greatest impact on you?
  5. What advice would you give your 20 year old self?
  6. You walk into a bar, what do your order from the bartender?
  7. Who are you reading?
  8. Who are you learning from?
  9. What have you learned in the past year that has impacted your life the most?
  10. What historical figure do you resonate with most?
  11. What is one thing that you've learned in your life that you feel most people overlook?
  12. How do you lead your family?
  13. What single person has had the biggest impact on you?
  14. What single person has had the biggest impact on your leadership?
  15. What single person has had the biggest impact on how you lead your family?
  16. How do you set goals? What are you currently working to achieve?
  17. What is the most impactful book you have ever read?
  18. What book do you most often give as a gift?
  19. In what areas are you currently working to improve?
  20. When you think of the word successful, who is the first person to come to mind?
  21. What are your daily rituals?
  22. What purchase of $100 or less has most positively impacted your life?
  23. What are you best at?
  24. Something people would be surprised to learn about you?
  25. What one book would you recommend everyone read?
  26. Do you have a morning routine? If so, what is the most important thing you do to start each day?
  27. The Pareto Principle states, that 80% of your results come from 20% of your efforts, what is your 20%?
  28.  What gets you out of bed in the morning? What are you most passionate about?
  29. What rejuvenates your soul? What places or activities help you recharge?
  30. When do you feel most productive?